In a recent HBR Article, the Chairman of Vital Smarts, Joseph Grenny and HR executive, Derek Cullimore, addressed how to plan a conversation specifically around potential conflict and anxiety regarding current pain points between employers and employees, ie: transitions from home to office, vaccinations, masks among others. Here is an excerpt;

Prepare for the beginning of the conversation

"Much of our anxiety about tough conversations comes from our uncertainty about how they’ll begin. We rest easier if we have a plan for the opening exchange — roughly the first 30 seconds. Fortunately, there’s not a lot of controversy about how to construct it. My colleagues and I have spent decades examining how to approach this “hazardous half-minute.”

Your first task is not to solve the problem, it’s to create psychological safety. If others feel safe with you, they can engage in even-spirited disagreement in a way that’s productive. If they feel unsafe, even the smallest bones of contention can become insurmountable behemoths. The way to help others feel psychologically safe is to reassure them of two things: 1) You care about their needs and concerns, and 2) you respect them. The best way to do both is to validate the values you think they bring to the conversation."

But how you do this is key! This is where the CIQ (Communication IQ) methodology can set you up for success. Everyone wants to be heard, understood and appreciated, so if you know how both of you process communication the safe zone becomes a connect zone. Every person communicates through three intelligences in a personal and predictable order unique to them. It is that order, or language, that makes the actual connection and speaks to the others' communication intelligence. The three communication intelligences are Kinetic, Emotive and Cognitive. They show up in an order that makes up your personal communication DNA whenever you communicate. Knowing this about yourself and about the one(s) you work with, for, and those you care about, will make even the most difficult conversations enormously more productive and successful. Be safe and connected!